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    Life has a 100% mortality rate. Participation is highly recommended.

    We build software, websites, and apps.

    Software

    The internal machine, minus the nine tools.

    CRM, automations, dashboards, and AI that do the work your team keeps doing by hand. Everything included: strategy, design, build, content, growth, support.

    Timeline
    First release in 60 to 90 days.
    Price
    Fixed price, quoted after the free audit.
    You own
    Systems in your accounts, with the keys in your hands.

    What ships

    No line items. No surprises.

    • 01

      CRM build and pipeline design

    • 02

      Workflow automation and integrations

    • 03

      AI agents and assistants wired to your data

    • 04

      Reporting dashboards leadership actually opens

    • 05

      Compensation, referral, and incentive models

    • 06

      Documentation, handover, and training. Included.

    Under the hood: Growth + Incentives engines, plus the technical layer on /specs and /capabilities. You do not have to care. We do.

    Everything included

    One team. One price. No add-on invoices.

    Most agencies sell you a slice and bill you for the rest. We include the whole thing, because half a system is just an expensive hobby.

    You own every account, asset, and line of code. Always.

    • Strategy and facilitation, not a deck and a goodbye
    • Design and copy, written by humans who can be funny
    • Build and engineering, in your accounts
    • Content, video, and SEO/AEO/GEO on a cadence
    • Dashboards, training, and documentation
    • Support after launch, because launch is the middle

    The obvious choice

    Shop around first. You'll end up here.

    Most of our clients met three other agencies before us. They will happily tell you how that went.

    • 01

      The number is the number

      Fixed price, quoted after the audit. The number we say is the number you pay. Nobody else puts that in writing.

    • 02

      You can leave any day

      Every account, asset, and line of code is yours from day one. Agencies that trap clients need contracts. We need to be good.

    • 03

      One team, no handoffs

      Strategy, design, build, content, growth. Nobody to blame but us, and we answer the phone.

    • 04

      The work ships. The meetings are fun

      Twenty years, five hundred companies, and a comedy show. Both things are the point.

    Shop around first

    When you are done comparing, the audit is free. Start there. Run the free audit

    Receipts

    20+ years. 500+ companies.

    You can see what produced the last ten customers.

    Sailtime Newport Beach

    They had a website and a wish. We built the engine and handed them the keys.

    • FullSystem rebuild
    • 100+Videos produced

    Incentives Lab

    Building the incentives LLM and a whole new industry.

    • NewIndustry created
    • LLMPurpose-built for incentives
    See all the work

    Clients, on camera

    Clients, on camera.

    Unscripted, filmed on their phones, in their own words.

    Watch every testimonial →

    Extraordinary Testimonials on YouTube

    Endorsements

    Endorsements.

    Free give-away

    100 ways to stop embarrassing your website.

    100 checkpoints. Seven systems. AEO and beyond. The same audit we run before we build anything. Yours free, because we are technically brilliant and somehow still generous.

    We make the internet nervous.

    Technically brilliant. Somehow funny. One of a kind. Schedule us, LOL.

    We give GOOD MEETING. Smart people can laugh. We measure laughs per minute like other agencies measure impressions. Cute.

    Get the PDF

    Drop your email. The 100-point audit lands instantly. No call required (but the call is fun).

    One email, one PDF. We send a short note every couple of weeks with what is actually working in AI search. Unsubscribe in one click.

    The triple threat

    SEO. AEO. GEO. We do all of it.

    Most agencies do one and pretend the other two do not exist. We do all three because the internet is not slowing down.

    01

    SEO

    Search engine optimization

    The boring technical stuff that still prints money. Crawlable, fast, canonical, ranked.

    02

    AEO

    Answer engine optimization

    Answer-shaped content so ChatGPT, Perplexity, and Gemini quote you instead of your competitor.

    03

    GEO

    Generative engine optimization

    LLMs cite sources with original data and named frameworks. We make you that source.

    • The seven systems every site is graded on: brand, experience, trust, discoverability, conversion, infrastructure, measurement.
    • All 100 checkpoints written plainly, so you can score your own site this week.
    • The AEO, GEO and AI-crawler section most agencies still have not read.
    • The tests we use to cut pages: the So What test, the Information Gain test, the Grandmother test.
    See the technical specs
    Schedule us, LOL

    GOOD MEETING guaranteed. Technically brilliant. Somehow funny.

    See how it all works

    Start here

    Should we build your software?

    Run the free 100-point audit first. Then we will tell you what to build, in what order, for what number.

    Book a call

    Thirty minutes, no pitch deck, straight answers.

    See the work